JERUSALEM

Yes, we have arrived in Jerusalem, and yes, I do still have a blog.  I have been meaning to record my "first impressions" of Jerusalem, so here it goes; in no particular order...

1.  Not to state the obvious, but there is a lot of Hebrew (language) here - and I can't make heads or tales of it.  The grocery store is absolutely a mystery to me. I don't know if i'm buying sour cream, yogurt, buttermilk or cheese.  Stare and study as I might, I simply cannot make backwards c's and n's into words.  There is just so little english here to help figure out what signs are trying to convey.  Entrance or exit?  Got me.  Is this item on sale?  Heck if I know.  $100 for those groceries?  If you say so.  

2.  Apartment life with 3 young(ish) kids and a dog is the pits.  Our apartment is absolutely lovely and the location can't be beat, but I long to slide open a back door and let the kids burn off their energy.  Margo, who has never lived in an apartment (*accuracy disclaimer: this is not actually true, but i'm not responsible for the decisions Margo made before she came into our lives) is struggling with the concept that she is supposed to relieve herself WHILE she is on a walk, not ask to go out 20 minutes after we return home.  

3.  Jerusalem is a large, bustling city.  Actually it's not; which is why I get scoffed at when I express this observation to co-workers and locals.  Jerusalem is actually a very small city, but to this 3rd world surfing bumpkin, it's crazy here!  In my defense we live smack in the city center of downtown and that means it's, well, often really noisy.  

4.  The Prime Minister is our neighbor.  This is either really good (security wise, lots of guards, etc.) or really bad (big stinking bullseye).  This also ties nicely into talking point #1 (too much Hebrew).  The first night we were here (and most subsequent nights) we heard bunches of sirens and bullhorns squawking, followed by some sort of announcement (in Hebrew, of course) and more sirens.  I look at Mike and say, "ahhh, should we know what they are saying, because it sounds kinda important?"  Well, we didn't, so we just continued to eat our dinner or whatever it was we were doing.  Turns out that the sirens, squawking, bullhorns and announcements are from Bibi's motorcade blocking off streets.  At least that's what I think is going on.  Rest assured, if there are mass announcements about some impending disaster, we will remain blissfully unaware, thanks to all the blasted Hebrew!

5.  It is possible to walk uphill both ways.  You can't go anywhere here without going uphill; yet when you turn around to come home it never fails that you are walking uphill.  Those old-timers were not yanking your chain.

6.  Moving to Jerusalem has serious implications on our social life.  Mike and I called in a babysitter for the first time last night.  We paid the equivalent of $65 (inclusive of taxi fare) for 4 hours.  The babysitter cost more than our evening out.  Don't judge me that I'm seriously contemplating the legal implications of having Sophia (she's 9) start babysitting.

7.  There are no bagels here.  Those of you that are familiar with my co-dependent love affair with carbohydrates know how painful this discovery has been.  Trust me, I share your outrage and disgust and all-around despair.  There really is no justice in this world.  I literally sat down one night and googled "Why are there no bagels in Jerusalem."  It seems I was not the only one who felt they had been bamboozled.  The only explanation I uncovered is that New York got the bagel Jews and Jerusalem got the falafel Jews.  Seems true enough because there is lots of falafel here and I must admit that it is really delicious.

Still wanna visit??